EMBRACE THE PROCESS OF GROWING

I have come to love the process of growing and the process of overcoming adversity. I read the book “Rising Strong” when I was going through a very difficult time and I continue to read it to this day whenever my resilience is being tested. The book really helps you “rise strong” from adversity. It teaches you that there is beauty in coming back from going through a difficult time. I also really like the title of the book because it shows that in rising, we come out of that particular situation stronger that we ever could have imagined. This book really helped me learn how to see my own strength because I tend to admire strength in other people, but not in myself. I have overcome a lot of things in my life and I will continue to overcome as I continue, but now I can look at myself in the mirror and look at those situations that have tested my resilience with pride. Now when I am going through a difficult time, instead of wallowing and feeling sorry for myself I read Brene Brown’s “rising strong and I am reminded of how strong I am and how strong we all truly are.

I am a conquerer

I am resilient

I am strong

Thank you for reading. Until next time.

 

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TELL YOUR OWN STORY

One of the reasons that I created this blog was because I wanted to tell my story on my terms. I didn’t want to be defined by other people and put myself in a box. I fell in the most public way possible and everyone had something to say about it and I am pretty sure some people still have something to say about it today. Everyone had different opinions about what caused my psychosis. I allowed these people to have opinions of what happened to me for a really long time. I was so ashamed of my disease that I kept allowing them to speak for me. I now want to create a place where I can open up about who I am as a person and some of the struggles I still face today instead of having other people speak for me. People will always have their opinions, but at the end of the day the opinions that matter the most in the whole world is your own. People will do and say a lot of things to try to tear you down. I have decided to give myself a voice and to allow myself to be heard on my own terms.

I deserve to be heard

I have a voice

I am loved

Thank you for reading. Until next time

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THE PROBLEM IS HOW I SPEAK TO MYSELF

I recently had some terrible criticism the other day and even though I knew that it wasn’t true, it stung deeply. I spend the whole day ruminating over the comment and thinking about it over and over again. It really hurt. After some reflection, I realized that the comment hurt yes, but I kept ruminating over it because of some of the things that I have told myself in the past. I used to say some pretty unkind things to myself and there are some days today where I have to tell myself not to speak to myself that way. So, sometimes when someone speaks to me in the way that I used to speak to myself, it is a trigger for me. It reinforces some of the old thoughts that I used to have about myself. I start believing that since I believed it before, it mus be true because the other person has said it. Not everything that we think is true, and just because someone loves you doesn’t mean that their criticism is always true.

I am healing

I am recovering

I am growing

Thank you for reading.Until next time

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COUNTING THE SMALL VICTORIES

I was having a conversation with a friend the other day and while we were talking, she mentioned the importance of acknowledging the small victories. She said that people have a tendency of focusing on the big victories and the  big victories are the only ones we consider to be accomplishments. We tend to forget the small steps that are going to help us get to where we need to be.Getting up in the morning,taking a shower,brushing your teeth, and exercising are all examples of things that are small victories that can take you very far.This is such a new perspective for me because i’m learning to acknowledge even the tiniest steps that I take towards my health,recovery,and being the best version of myself. Even if other people don’t always see these things as victories,they are victories to me and that is the most important thing. She also mentioned that it is important to celebrate how far you have come because that is where the growth lies. So thank you girl, I learned  new perspective.

I am learning

I am growing

I am exploring

Thank you for reading. Until next time.

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DON’T FORGET TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF

It is very hard to take care of yourself in this go go go society that we live in. Everyone is much more focused on getting things done than making sure they have taken the time to take care of themselves. I used to be this way two until a year and a half ago. I neglected myself to the point where I finally cracked and experienced an episode of psychosis. I believed that everything needed to get done right away and that I could sleep and rest when those things got done. I lost sight of who I was and the world that we currently live in was no longer my reality. The episode of psychosis was my wake up call. I took time off of school and decided to spend time learning how to truly take care of myself. I developed ways that I learned how to cope with life in a while different way. I tossed away my philosophies and decided to adopt new ones. I learned that sleep was an important aspect of my day to day life. I also learned that I can’t do it all. There were some things that had to give up- late nights for example. Now that I am recovered and back in school, self-care is still a bit of a struggle for me. I am so used to being on the run that I sometimes forget that I need to take time to take care of myself because I matter too. I now have a schedule where I have to schedule in myself care so that I can actually take care of myself throughout the day. What are some of the struggles you face with taking care of yourself?

I matter

I love taking care of myself

I am growing each and everyday

Thank you for reading.Until next time

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HEALING

I have said this before to my friends and family, but it is finally time to start healing and letting go. This is the year where I will continue on the lifelong journey of forgiving those that have hurt me and forgiving myself for the hurt that I have inflicted on others. It is time for me to move with my life and finally become the person that I am supposed to be. Forgiveness is essential to growth and I cannot continue to grow if I do not learn to forgive others. I have to become the best version of myself and this will begin when I learn how to love other unconditionally without any hatred in my soul. It is time for  me to let go so that I can finally become the best version of myself. I have to move on and allow myself to heal. This is going to be the hardest thing for me to achieve. I recognize that by forgiving others and myself, I will be doing what has been asked of me as a human being. I will also be taking care of myself and learning to move on with my life. It is time for me to be the best person that I can be. It is time for me to move on and let go. It is time for me to finally allow myself to have the peace of mind that I deserve.

I am learning

I am growing

I am healing

Thank you for reading. Until next time

Image from :http://www.nasrq.com/SARA/December-2015/Healing-the-Soul-from-Past-Life-Trauma/

LOVE YOURSELF

I never used to understand why I always heard people say that love starts with self  because for many years I never had a good relationship with myself. I always thought that someone would enter my life and show me what love meant. This thinking stopped when I learned about self love.Self love is one of the hardest and most challenging things I have had to conquer. I had to get to a place where I realized that I was worth the hard work. I had to learn that I was worth being kind to myself and was quite deserving of it. I started by changing the way that I spoke to myself. I realized that I deserved to be spoken to the same way I speak to other people. I speak to other people with kindness and respect, so why shouldn’t I speak to myself in the exact same way? I am as much of a person as everyone else and I truly deserve to treat myself with love and respect. I stopped calling myself stupid,dumb,etc and starting focusing on my positive qualities. This is much easier said than done, don’t get me wrong for as the saying goes “old habits die hard”. It took a lot of time to stop speaking to myself this way and to be honest, I still struggle with it some days. I have days where I have to tell myself “please don’t speak to me like that” because I know that i don’t deserve to be spoken to with disrespect, especially from myself because I live in me and if I don’t have a healthy relationship with myself, how can I have a healthy relationship with other people. Everyday I make the commitment to love and truly honor who I am as a person.

I am in love with myself

I value myself

I am learning about myself each and everyday

Thank you for reading.Until next time.

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